Yoga as understood by me.

Yoga notes day 1

What is yoga? It is not acrobatic and neither it is renunciation of life. It is developing a holistic and wholistic view of yourself. Understanding the life force, work on limitations of body, mind and subconscious. Move towards its unlimited power. The purpose of yoga is to 

“असतो मा सत गमय -> from delusion to truth 

तमसो मा ज्योतिर्गमय -> from darkness to light

मृत्योर्मा अमृतंगमय -> from perishing life to immortality 

Beauty of Yoga is that it allows you to live life of king or beggar alike. It means even though situation changes, your response does not change and it remains aligned with yoga and detachment and nature. So you will be able to enjoy pleasures of worldly life but not be attached to it. Because as they come, they will be gone. 

Another thing is Yoga is lifestyle and not mere exercise. You are stepping here on long path for a very bigger goal I.e. Becoming enlightened. You will find through today's theory why it is so.

First assumption : everything is permeated by the universal life force which some call god, some call nature. There are many involuntary systems in our body and in nature which have no explanation and hence above assumption helps understand that magic better.

You can not face the Brahman or the all permeating life force without finding that in yourself and to find it in yourself you have to clean yourself, cleaning of body, mind, surrounding, thoughts. Yoga is infectious when it starts and it rules all parts of your life.  There are no exceptions to it. You will slowly start reflecting on each facet of life and apply yoga there.  Because it works. It works only because it has aligned itself to the laws of nature. We can not succeed in Yoga by breaking the laws of nature. Krishna says, when person is hungry, he thinks of food & eats as much as he can and not as much as he need. However Yogi will not think of food but plants which give him food and take only what is essential for him and be grateful for that food to the plant. He thinks about others. 

First yoga sutra says : चित्त(mind) वृत्ति(behaviour, habits) निरोधः (restraint)

Without control on habits your mind won't be tamed 

For that Change the grocery bill

Change the pattern

Read what will help you achieve

Eat what will help you achieve

Change the time you spend on various things be it TV, friends, mobile, food. 

Yoga has 8 legs (some call it ashtang yoga)

We will talk about first two legs of yoga out of 8.  As I think these are key to success to end goal and indisputably the most core requirement without which you can not reach the end goal.

1 यम (universal morality)

२ नियम (purification by discipline)

३ आसन (postures for body)

४ प्राणायाम ( rhythmic control of breath)

५ प्रत्याहार (withdrawal and emancipation of mind senses from domination of external objects)

६ धारणा (concentration)

७ ध्यान (meditation)

८ समाधी (awareness of superconscious brought about by mastery over all above steps. The practitioner becomes one with the object of his meditation i.e. Universal Spirit)

Yam and niyam controls passion, habit, emotions & asana helps keep body healthy and in harmony with nature and finally yogi becomes conscious of body and later overcomes it’s limitations.  

1 Yam : What are yam ? Thery are set of laws of nature that we need to internalise in our life. They stood test of time, religion. 

- अहिंसा : non-violence. The violence starts in thoughts and culminated in action. So we have to keep looking out for violence in thoughts. When they are getting planted, we observe them and analyse and allow them to die naturally without translating into action. Violence also is present when you contribute to the meat-eating food chain by eating meat when other wholesome options are available. Move as much down as you can on the food chain. Plants are at the bottom as they can convert food from sunlight and water and nutrients from soil. So try to move in that direction. 

- सत्य : be truthful. You will realise that there are physiological changes when you speak lie. Purely because it is against law of nature to be untruthful. Therefore you start punishing yourself emotionally draining and worrying about if someone will know the reality.  Being truthful means wading bare truth but at the same time avoid being harsh as that would in someway be breach of non-violence pledge. Taking it to next level, we need to align our thoughts and action. The truthfulness should be implied in each sequence of life. We can't be thinking one and acting other. 

- अस्तेय (चोरी) (desire to possess that someone has): we often feel urge to possess after seeing something that someone else has. That creates two emotions. First if you are able to afford it, it will be sense of identification with that new possession (unless it is a necessity). If you can’t afford it, that will turn into jealousy without you realising it! 

- ब्रम्हचर्य : here it does not mean celibacy. Restraint:  All our sages were having their family. They were Yogi for sure. So clearly it means something else. I think it must mean to have everything in right portion and not being obsessed about anything. So you could have good food, family and material possession to enjoy. You will however have balance in every enjoyment and ensure nothing sticks to your mind that gives you a heart break when it leaves you. इदं न मम। enjoy it but never allow anything to overtake you mind. Enjoy it with a feeling it is not mine.

- अपरिग्रह : Sharing (Not hoarding):  it simply means allow flow of what you have to others. Share/ Pass on your material, intellectual possessions to society. Practically in old days Yogi never used to keep food for even evening as they would beg every meal. But for current context it just means you can keep things with you as much you need and help others as much as you can with what you have. Cut down on your needs so the portion you help keeps increasing. 

2 Niyama (personal discipline / hygiene) : so Yam stood for understanding laws of nature and aligning with them. Now we have to ensure we internalise these principles  by disciplining our body, brain and mind

- शौच : In short, it means having a clean bowel. It means maintaining very holistic view of what goes inside and in what portion. Because that will decide whether bowel will remain naturally clean or not. So eat what takes you closer to your goal. Of having a very happy, healthy and holy bowel! But larger meaning is cleaning of body internally and externally. This means a clean shower, keeping yourself neat and tidy while also internalising the cleanliness for body parts.

- संतोष : This is about having satisfaction out of every action. Every moment. This does not mean you can’t aspire to improve your current effort or level. It just means there is constant satisfaction behind current state and next improvement. This has very subtle effect of being unperturbed by delay in improvements or momentary decline.   

- तप  (extreme commitment and hardwork): Everything and anything you involve yourself in must be done with extreme commitment and hard work. There should dedication to every action and moment. Unison effort by your heart, mind, body and senses. Pour your heart into efforts. Being in mode of constantly reaching your limits and pushing the boundaries. At the same time keeping your satisfaction in efforts. 

- स्वाध्याय (Self-study) : Simply attending the class will not improve your development of yog. You need to study, learn. Derive meaning for yourself. Same applies to everything. You must continue using your brain to study in detail what you do. You must be student and keep self learning all the time. You may be in any role in life or profession. But being on the path of yoga, you must constantly unravel the knowledge. 

- ईश्वर परिधान (dedication): Whatever you do, dedicate to god, society, nature. That way you will not grow in ego while you grow in accomplishments. There are unknown efforts behind every success and recognising them keep your mind in humble mode. Reduce taking credit for success even if at the apparent level you have done everything required. As to spread credit, you will have more people around you connected to your mind, effort, cause. That will eventually make your goal a mission for many (as long as it has larger cause).

Once we start practicing these yam and niyama, we will surely grow in Yoga. The next level is cleansing the physical and mind and matter. We will discuss that in next blog.

Losing Father

Losing father at a young age of 6 is very different. I cried but I didn't understand my loss is permanent. Because I didn't understand death. I cried because everyone around me was crying and was in a very sorrow and unfortunate situation. I neither understood the process/illness that culminates into death nor I fathomed funeral that follows death. Seeing motionless father who has been filled with action until recently is a rude shock to a tender child. Not knowing where to go for things, I was previously going to father for, was another big trauma. Mother is inconsolable and father is nowhere to be seen. A fumbling child closes out mind with eyes desperately searching for something he does not know. I tried to answer questions for myself with the underdeveloped mind. The old memories slowly trickled down in the mind as there were no more memories to be made about the father. I changed place because we could not stay in that house consequently I changed school too. Made me even more vulnerable, irritated. Nothing seemed in my control. Not even the lap of the mother as she was busy looking after younger sibling and I bore the burden of being older at an age of 6. I developed the stigma about the lack of something that is not my fault. I started trusting things around but inside I was just aware that faith is very thin. As thin as the guarantee of life. That failed for my father. 

I ran but felt that drag on my feet. I studied hard but met the limit. I pushed hard and realised there is something I don't have. And that push became harder. Because I wanted to substitute the lack of something with that push. It worked sometimes and gave me success but it started applying a layer to the vacuum of loss of a father in the mind. That layer took me away from the pain. It gave many moments of joy for my present effort. But it never healed or filled that vacuum. In my growing days, I had to become more independent and someone who can look after siblings. I needed to stand out with my behaviour. It is very similar to the moulding process. It gave me shape but not strength. As a young child, I became dis-engaged with my childhood. I kept my emotions charged with the weight of that trauma.  I carried the burden of a lot of pity, sympathy. It was hard to come out of loss because pity gave me feeling of someone victimised by nature, situation, circumstances that are beyond my control. It put my self-confidence on the back-foot. I continuously hid myself. As the continuous self-portrayal must go on. I don't know if there is any healing process for such loss that repairs/refills the vacuum. The age neither gives a clue of that vacuum nor a solution. I walked on the path not having any end in the mind. 

The sheer sight of a child with father left me in an acute grip of that vacuum. There was no one to own my mistakes. No one to help me learn from failures. No one to lift me with pride when I came first in the sports. The strong hand that holds a child against troubles and teaches him how to face them leaves him to do that on his own. I was left with my instinct. Those with positive instinct improve and those with negative perish. There is a lot of evidence I went through to show the success is circumstantial and then my attempts and hardship tried to bridge the gap. In going that way, I was constantly reminded by some twitch in the guts that I am missing something. I became unpredictable about what will break me and what will not. Suddenly a small reason reminded me the loss and without any control on the eyes and emotions, tears ran down the cheek profusely. It was hard to repair! When I grew up and reduced the dependency on the father, the wound became a part of my personality that did not hurt so much and so frequently.

But it hounded me back in a surprising way when I myself became the father of a child. I cried and surrendered to God to not orphan that child of mine. I loved the life like never before. But in the mind, I knew very clearly that death was as certain as broad daylight. Then one part of me always woke up with a mission to prepare my children to live without me. The only way was through hard discipline. But then I also knew that vacuum can never be filled/repaired through any preparation. Neither for me and nor for my child. 

All that left me to live the day as if I was going to meet the death tomorrow, Making most of the day. A better way to live life. However, only I knew the cost at which I have learnt this, is very very expensive................. 

Rahul Karurkar